* She picks up phone.. puts on ear phones…clicks on media file..scrolls to music..
Hits the enter button..
“Miley cyrus’s ” Wrecking Ball”..buzzes through into her ear through the headphones..
……A tear rolls down her eyes..
Followed by many more..and thunderous sobs..
…….Rebbecaa was broken….
She was like a fragile..little bird, with chirped wings..never have flown..but wished to soar and be free. She yearned for such..now.
..She’s had the worst and she wondered if ever..she would have what she always dreamt off.
…First, Nick..love her life..went off ..so far away..making her fall into pieces. She wondered if she would ever see him again nor love anyone as much as as she loved him?
Years later, and still no luck with men.
Not that she wasn’t a looker, she was beautiful and brilliant and wasn’t all bad in the other areas…the only different thing about her was that she needed love well as every other thing.
She wouldn’t settle for less.
So if someone wants her..he should be for real..because if she would give her all..she expects nothing short of that.
She has being described as..”Too loving! Too mushy!
Too blawdy romantic and she wondered what was so wrong with that.
She loves the physical too and sheer feeling of intimacy..but she always wants all that and more in a defined territory..where she could confidently spread her winks and fly.
What’s so wrong in wanting a man who would love and respect her?
Want and need her? profess,provide and protect her?
Are these alien to the male species?
..or when it comes to her..they look the other way..only when they feel the tightening of their frontal parts of their pants and they come running for her to stroke their libido?
*Rebecca shakes her head*
She is done with Collosal asses as that.
A real man..who would treat her as though she is the only woman in the world.
Treat her as his queen because she would treat him as her king. Its a two-way street..its a win-win.
But yet…all these are just wishful thinking.
Its a complicated situation..and still feels thesame.
She can’t afford any other heart break..tis only so much her heart can take..
Peter!!..big and strong, rich..famous… And yet proud and uptight…man of his own self..
He wouldnt treat her as his queen..yet..but a lady.
He wouldn’t talk to her as much as she would..yet would cook for her and treat her to the comfort of his home.
He would while away his pastime with gadgets…purr with strangers and friends over phone and internet and wouldn’t make small talks with her.
This infuriates her.
Because she has begun to care. Much more than she should.
She would feel or think he does too thesame way only when they are entwined in passionate embrace and afterwards..forgotten.
She would cuddled up. She would ask..and he would give her and answer she so desires..
She always hated to assume.
She didn’t know and couldn’t tell what they had.
He left nothing for her to go on with. She was begining to feel like a booty-call.
After a wonderful time.
Back to reality. Hoping that they both are on thesame page.
But last breaklight of Mr. Uptight and cute..and famous..didn’t keep her number on speed dial.
Its been like for ages.
Its happening again *she sobs*
He drops her like a bad habit.
“When there is no communication.. Nothing can be helped”
..She refused the urge to be that girl.
“She is the girl…she wants to be the girl and enjoy been chased and wooed and professed to too.
Not thrown away like she is some piece of furniture.
*puts the song on repeat*
Vincent..calm, beautiful, quiet..peaceful..brooding..
Says all the right things.
Tall and elegant in posture. Sweet natured. Sensitive to the touch.
He would calm her down when she is all fired up. Talk to her all through the night.
He was a low caste. Barely had enough to spell his name..
To make ends met. But he does what he can.
Yet…she fears that he is just like the rest of them.
They all come…like a cute harmless puppy only for a lil to pass and they become viscious dogs.
She has seen enough of that.
She needed real.
She needed awesome real..no heartbreaks no halftruths.
Just honestly,love and commitments.
He says he’s here to stay despite all.
He freaks her out. And yet..so much time spent, wonderful time.
So much more …she loves the attention.
She loves that she is being talked with not talked too and talked at..
She only hope its for reall.
He would go an extra mile. He says her first…
*she blushes in remembrance*
Disclaimer#…Matters of the hearts are really heavy.
Peter and vincent.
Tough and soft.
Uptight and free..
How does one do this? She askes herself? Give up one for the other?
They both been sweet. But peter sees her only when he deems convenient..he kept his options open,
Vincent…not a waking moment passes.
She needs all the cosyness and love.
Yet..she is scared of being tossed and butted out.
Vincent..sweet and all..but peter…comfortable and settled.
Oh..what to do?
Peter retraces his step and wants in..vincent wants her to stay.
Tug of war on both sides..oh her heart is in such a torment.
Follow your heart! They say..
And its vincent her heart longs for.
And would miss peter as well
..Intelligent know-it-all self that’s so amazing ..and yet..
He wouldn’t be what she desires.
Vincent wants to. Yearns to. ..
If only she can move pass that nagging feeling that they aren’t both players and covers up?
..Rebecca..picks up the phone and dials him that makes her heart flutter and makes her legs grow week on the the knee.
“Hey baby” he answered.
P.S….Rather have someone who would give up the world to be with you than give you up to be with the world.
Rather have love, trust and honesty and not centered on material things. They would fade out, what would keep it going is what you feel. Other things would follow.