I had gone to spend the weekend with my brothers and their family.
It was just a nice getaway..
And I enjoyed every bit of it..
The kids had so much energy I found myself breathing hard after doing piggy rides…
Track runs or just playing hide and seek and catch me if you can.
I was happy that they were happy and found partners that not only loved them but gave them such wonderful homes.
I wanted that.
That serene love and happiness.
I had never really felt lonely.
But I had to admit that there was a missing factor in my life..
Love of a man.
Not of the love of my father or brothers..
Or love of my mother..
I had those in abundance
But the love of a man that loves a woman..
But what to do when all the men wanted you only when they needed their libido stroked than committing and have you long termed.
And I really wasn’t interested in those sorts.
I needed one who not only will respect and value me.
Commit to me.
And treat me like the most important and treasured person in his life amongst other things..
And no matter how long…
I would rather wait than settle for less..
Mother’s words seared through my thought’s. .
“You should go out more often dear..
You cant work all through your youth and have no time for fun..for friends and all that”..
“I will ma’..when I have the time
“Liz love..when don’t you ever??
“Call vicky or sussan morris. .have a girl’s night out…
“I thought you said those girls aren’t good companies? ?…i asked ..
She recollected. .
“Well true ..
But not as though you got new friends..
I trust you enough to make the right decisions and to know what’s good and healthy for you..”
“Doesn’t mean you would let their bad behaviour rub off on you”.
“Or make new friends.
Do what other young girls your age do.
Go on a date.”
“How do you expect to find a proper man when you hide yourself behind your desk and the only people you have fun with is your family??”..
I didnt comment…
Well i sort off did..
“I don’t need a man ma”..
“Oh don’t be silly.
“Every woman does. .you are just confused with those made up love stories you forget this is reality honey..
And prince charming don’t exist.”
“By the way..I and your father are going over to Tanner glove Town next weekend..and just before you say anything..we don’t need a babysitter .
I too need to spend time with my handsome and No..We don’t need you”…she smiled..
“Go find your own fun”..
She drew my chicks..
Just then my phone rang before I could comment.
“Oh hi liz..its me sussy-vi..”..
“Oh vicky..how are you?”..I asked absentmindedly
Ma heard and paused ..listening in..
“Oh am just divine Darlene. ..
How is the hospital and kids..hope you are just fine dear and ain’t losing too much slip over those lil devils..??”
“Really vicky – sue? .”
“Kids are.from heaven and a blessing..don’t be evil”..
Her rich laughter filled my ears..
“Oh you know me..never forgets to make an impression”..
What do I owe the pleasure of this call?..I was impatient.
Ma hadn’t moved away.
“Well..Becky…you remember Becky?
“Well…is having a party out at her ranch next weekend..
And everyone who is anyone is gonna be there..”
“Some rich ass fine blokes too..
And plus you get to see and reacquaint yourself with the oldies..
Am sure they would be glad to see how our flat liz turned out…”…
Her laugh was excruciating to my ears..
“Oh I see…
Thing is i would love too…but..
I got like swamped in for next weekend and am going with my parents outer town for the weekend too…so you know…
“Oh…you.cant skip??…C’mon you get to see your family for ever. Don’t be a spoil sport. ..am sure you don’t get out much with all the doctor stuff you got going on..”
“Plus You need to add spice to your life..
I will even pick out something sexy and pretty for you and introduce you around..
Oh it would be fun…”.
I turned it down as best I could.
I wasn’t interested. .
“Oh vicky – sue how thoughtful of you.. but maybe next time…?…
‘Oh Bullocks! !”..
I heard my mother say before she dragged the phone off my hands and moved away from my reach when I tried to get it back..
“Oh hello dove..its liz’s mother…
“I just remembered that we got only two tickets and it’s abit late to get a third..
“What do you know..
Unfortunately liz would be all but by herself and I feel really bad already…
“Am sure she wouldn’t mind going for the party over the weekend..
“Oh that’s Just divine Mrs Blake…
“You can come pick her up next weekend..
I’ll make sure she will be on her best behaviour..
She laughed. Or they laughed.
“Lovely day too…
She cuts the line and stared at my stony faced.
“You know what they say..
You want something done..
Do it yourself..
“And you are going.
Get something pretty and style your hair..
“What’s the worse that could happened.?”
‘If you really don’t like the company..you can leave and come straight home.
But atleast go and try to be nice.
Repay the courtesy. .
Afterall it’s not everyday One gets an invite plus it’s not nice to turn down a harmless invite. .”
She dropped the phone in my outstretched hands..
Stuffed a cookie in my mouth.
Kissed my forehead and walked off..
With a smile on her face..
It was hard hating on ma.
I knew she met well..
But I liked making my decisions not forced into one..
“Whats the worst that could happen right??”.