I walked blindly around the house..
It felt like a maze I was still trying to fix the puzzle of what my life once was
My world had shattered. .leaving behind only broken heart and utter misery.
The four corners of this house..we both called a home..where love and happiness was mixed bringing out sweet smelling savour that sweetened our glands and caused us to be in a constant state of euphoria. ..just upped and poofed like a magic trick done in a black dipped hat with a stick held by the smiling clowning man who thinks tricks gladdens the heart…but this trick only crumbled the walls of my already bleeding heart.
Every room..Every object ..Every little thing had scents of you in them..Every mirror or reflective surface I see you smiling and twirling in that fancy new dress..
The house is a disaster. ..the kitchen is in merciless disarray. ..am sorry…I know how you hate the place you live in to be a complete state of mess…but how do you expect me to think…when all I am is lost and my world is in an utter state of nothingness.
Fire and ice..that we were called…
You were hot and I was cold. .but together we broke down the barrier of race and we really turned out nice.
You always said I was crazy …but to me you were beautiful …the sparkle in your eyes were my pride and my greatest joy..
But the hands of death reached out and clawed out the heart from your chest..living behind an empty lifeless shell that used to be once a happy vibrant girl who stole my heart from the very first day I laid eyes on her…who broke down my defences when your smile paused me in my tracks I almost got ran over by a speeding truck..Whose first kiss under the mistitole made me breathless …Whose “I love you” was the begining of our love story..
Why did you leave?
You said we were going to be forever
I believed you.
You said our love would last a million times over..
I dropped everything and followed you. .
But you didn’t tell me that this would only be a dream…a short love fantasy that would end me being on my knees..cradling your head to my chest..
Rocking you as I would a baby. .draining the fountain of tears I have within over your soft silky hair I once ran my hands through when we were lost in the passionate dance of entwined lovers..
Please tell me what am I supposed to do without you..
My smiles are gone. .my mind is crazy
Our wedding frame is empty. .I don’t even recognise the stranger that stares back at me from the broken mirror that kissed my fist one time too many…Don’t worry I don’t even feel a thing..all I feel is numb and a aching pain in my chest ..
Shit I can’t even breath..
Let me die so I can lie beside you and feel my lungs with your lovely scent that would bring kings to their feet..
You are mine and I am yours..
You were my everything. ..
But you are selfish to leave me alone in this world that I suddenly feel alone. .
Make way for me. .
Tonight I will be with you..wrapped in your embrace so we can dance to eternity. .
For my world ended that day you left. .my life became meaningless as I lay on your side of the bed..
My love for you is like a curse of a thousand years…roaming the empty Streets like one who is the living dead..
For that is what I am..
Dead…completely dead..void of feelings.. of life of everything since the day you left..
Life is a mistery. .but death itself is the one who has taken you and left me with nothing but heart wrenching misery.