Those tingling feelings you get, butterflies in your tummy, feets curling up underneath you and those hidden smiles you can’t quite hide. Everything they say they feel in the book and movies she had read and watched, she oftened wondered how it felt in real life and If it was just the way they described; breathtaking and insanely intoxicated.
That wasn’t reality.. but she wished that she could one day, fall inlove and be loved insanely too as much.
Last night she had wanted to give herself up just because she was tired of being pursued by junior. She hated him, she hated him with everything within her, and she felt, though Bruno would be as bad as he is but he hadn’t shown any of his bad traits
“He is a pretender and you know the saying, pretenders does the worse” juniors words dance through her mind.
But yet, he had been calm and reserved, not chasing her, not wanting to harm her, he had been distant despite wanting to help her through school.
“He is bidding his time, waiting to come collect. You think what he is doing is for free because he is a good person. You think he wants to help you through school just because God is in heaven and all the angels are saints? and because he has money lying down anywhere or plucking it from trees? Bruno wants what I want and he would take it when he is ready. Me? At least I am making known my intentions to you, and I would make you enjoy it. Why not give in to pleasure and let me make you a woman so by the time he comes to collect, you won’t feel bad. Afterall he is doing you a favour, paying your fees, the least you can do is to appreciate him. But that’s after you let us , you and I , have fun. Let me take you to 7th heavens and back Amara. But despite how much you refuse, I would take you over and over again Amara , so stop fighting me” he had coerced one of those days
And yet, tired, frustrated and helpless.. she had done what she would ordinarily had never thought off, giving up the fights.
Picking the lesser devil, to give herself up to.
And what did he do.. He says No.
Even though it was obvious he was battling within himself and physically too, he said No.
Was he pretending to be a better man or was he a better man?
Bruno had suprised her. Yes, this wasn’t the first time he had seen her in all her womanly glory, but this was the first time she had willingling, though in tears, because she was tired..tired of it all, she had gone to him..begging him to do with her what he wanted so she could be free. Maybe then when junior realises she had given herself to his friend he would let her be.
But he. Had. Said. No!!.
She thought he was pretending and when he asked if he could dress her up she had stood, her heart going to her back because she had to sum up courage , blanking her mind, hoping for it to be over and done with. That he would stop with his pretense, one last time she stood infront of him and again, with his hands shaking; his breath warm and his other self all too visible, he said No.
Leaving her alone to her demons.
Relief and then shame washed over, as he left her alone. Tears gushing out of her eyes , she had gone to bed.
And if she admitted to herself honestly, she had begun to see him differently.
It was no wonder that she had really taken time to look at him, as he slept this morning
Bruno was not just an handsome man, he was beautiful too.
She blush remembering how he looked when she backed him to the door, how his chest heaved heavily when she closed the distance to him.
She was hiding her pains, her shame , closing her eyes but thinking really hard..
She remembered him holding her to him, really tight and she felt him grow hard close to her thighs.. for a second she wished that it was a warmth she wanted to hide herself into not because she was running.. but because she felt like home wrapped up in his embrace.
And when she reached out almost touching his lips with her fingers before his eyes shoots open, she wondered what would have felt to have him kiss her.
She turned pink.
“Whats wrong with you Amara?” She chides herself.
Knock knock knock..
She opens the door to find a stranger there..
“No!” She had replied when he said he was looking for Bruno and they were long time friends from school.
Bruno wasn’t home, she had told him so why was he standing there and staring at her.
“Timothy, my name is Timothy. Tell him it’s important that I see him when he comes..”
She had nodded, hoping he leaves. She shouldn’t have open the door.
“Whats your name?” He stares at her curiously..
“Why?” He shrugs
“Because I told you mine, I just feel it’s only right for me to ask you yours. Besides what’s the harm in it?”
She shouldn’t be talking to strangers, especially people who seemed as though there was a mistery about them. But she felt no fear from him. She didnt know if it was a good thing or a bad thing.
She sighs ” Amara!!”
The shock on his face and what he said next caused her heart to almost fly out of her mouth..
“I’ll be damned”
What did he mean..
“I’ll be damned ” he repeats, as though recognising her in ways she didn’t understand.
Then his phone rings, he looks at her smiling. ..
“Goodbye ” Amara says closing the door. An uneasy feeling rising up her sleeves.
“Helo?” Timothy smiles through the phone
“Guy where TF did you go to. You said you were coming one minute and the next you have been gone for over an hour. Hope you ain’t about to spill the beans on me, I swear I would say you helped me with it so use your head” he threatened
He had a brief second to decide, tell junior Amara was alife so he can get his shit and get out of his life.
Or tell him nothing, and let him simmer in guilt for awhile.
He pictures her face, angelic , beautiful, her curves goddesslike for a girl her age. He could understand the craze junior had over her, but not enough reason he wanted to go after a girl Bruno obviously care alot more for. She was in his house that means, they were either already an item or that Bruno knows it was junior who tried to manhandle her.. unless she hasn’t spilled because she was too scared to.
Should he tell junior, not because he wants him to go after her but because he was tired of him hiding out in his house and holding his own crime over his head that was years ago . He had paid his debt. He owed him nothing anymore. He just needed him out.
“TF mehn, where are you Timothy? ”
He sighs “took a stroll, coming back. Stop tripping ” he cuts the call.
Bruno deserves at least one loyal friend, even if not entirely. But anything is better than nothing.
“Mama?..how is nkechi’s sister and the baby , is everything all right. ?” She finally got through to her after trying all morning.
“My daughter na God oh. It was hell throughout the night, she almost gave up the ghost and lost the baby, we have been battling, the midwives were here and then nurse. But we thank God, it’s a girl. Nkechi is so happy, mother is happy, everyone is okay. The mother is still weak but we are praying for speedy recovery”
“Oh thank God.”! Amara smiles.
“And you, how are you I hope everything is okay Amara, where is Bruno. .i hope nothing of worry happened. ?”
She wondered if her mother was asking because she suspected or it was just a motherly instinct. .
“Everything is okay. Are you coming home soon?”
Deep sigh ” I should come back before night fall, but Nkechi’s mother had to run quickly to the village so she asked me to stay till she returns. I may come back in the morning. Sorry my daughter, you can come meet me here so we stay together, nkechi is here. You can stay with her in her room. ”
“Erm..No mama. It’s fine. I would wait here”
Why did she refuse..
“Are you sure? I hope Bruno would not mind. He has given me your school fees oh, I forgot to tell you”
Why is he doing this and he says he doesn’t want me that -way?
“Amara, did you hear. ? Don’t forgot to thank him and greet him for me”.
“Stay well my daughter. Please don’t hide anything from me, if anything is bothering you let me know, we shall brace the storm together ”
Not this kind of storm mama. Not this kind.
“Yes mama. Take care, greet Nk for me”
It was 2pm, what would she do till Bruno gets back?
I wanted to call her, but I fought the urge to. Maybe she had left for home. Maybe I should call her mother and find out if they were home.
Would that be too much?
I was peeing, and thinking to myself and I didn’t hear the door open or maybe I wasn’t paying attention.
Maybe one of the guys wanted to come empty his bladder , I saw them having one too many beers this afternoon.
It wasn’t till I felt a hand wrap around my torso and felt her hand reaching and wrapping my hammer did I realise who it was..I froze
“Let me help you with that. .” She flicked it ” Good boy. . Now let’s take you to a place where it’s warm and moist”
She rubs him, I grab her hands and push her away..
“Stop it Ngozi are you crazy. This is men’s toilet, have some control. ” I try tucking him back into my boxers but she wouldn’t let me
She pushes me to the wall, and crush herself to me, grinding. She was wearing a skirt but she had lifted it up. Grabbing my hands she takes it to her buttocks . She wasn’t wearing any panties.
She was the devil.
“Ngozi get the Fxxk away from me” she forces a kiss to my lips, grabbing me, raising her legs and wanting to insert my very hardened sef into her.
I was still pressed.
“Just go in baby, trust me you would be banging before you know it”
“STOP IT”!! with force I push her away from me, she hits the door shyly with her back and i bolted for the door. Only stopping to catch my breath once outside, adjusted myself and headed straight for my desk. I heard her curse .
It was 5:05 pm. I grabbed my things and padded down the stairs and headed home.
I think I faintly heard my name but I didn’t look back.
What did the bible say again. .. “Flee”
And I did.
She was sitting at the pavement when I arrived, her heads bowed on her legs.
Was she waiting for me or she was bored.
I suddenly felt bad for making her stay here. But wait, I thought she would have left back home and I had wanted to head to hers to make sure her mum was home too.
“Amara?” I shake her briefly, her eyes open up, seeing me she straightens up
She didn’t smile. Maybe I wished she had, it would have given me something to think about.
I needed a shower; I could smell Ngozi on me. I didnt want her to smell her on me too.
“Are you okay?” She nodded ..
“Have you eaten?”
“Am not hungry ”
Her stomach growled, I smiled.
Oh crap, I still didn’t have anything in my house and it was already late.
“Would you like to go out and eat something? ”
She looks at me suspiciously..
“Really Amara, you don’t trust me yet?”
She didn’t say anything. .. I needed to shower.
“Let me rush a quick bath and we talk about what you want to eat.” I walk inside..and came back out curious
For some strange reason I didn’t want her to leave but I was curious why she hadn’t gone home.
“Your mother, how is she. She hasn’t come back home?”
“Is all well?’
She nods her head.
Did I feel a little happy? Yes!
“Ok.” I disappeared into the house, had a quick shower and I came back out changing cloths…
But she doesn’t move.. she looked down at what she was wearing..
“What is it?”
“I have been wearing this since yesterday. ..” she trails off.
“Not like anyone would notice !!” I rest at the side of the door; amused.
“I would. ”
“I don’t mind. Plus it’s not as though you smell., trust me I would know. My nose is pretty sensitive. Plus you didn’t sleep in them, so..I think it’s okay. Plus— it’s late and besides you look pretty in it so, that’s a plus. Who cares, I don’t and I am not bothered and you are working with me”
Was that a tiny blush rising up her cheeks.
“Besides mad man no dey shame, naim people dey shame pass. But I am not ashamed working beside this particular mad girl.” I winked
She did have a beautiful laugh. ” shall we? ”
I reach for her to pull her up but she doesn’t take my hand, she gets up avoiding my eyes
“What are you in the mood for? Rice, beans, suya …what?”
“Plantain porridge? ” she whispers. .
I look to see if mama’s Basira’s was still open. She made a mean ass porridge .
“Plantain porridge it is” I smiled.
Timothy came back whistling , happier and more excited. He even offered to make dinner
“Whats making you so happy? ” Junior asked, he was sprawled on the sofa staying at the mute screen
“Nothing. The Lord is God. Can’t one be happy for nothing.”
“Not when you left here all gloomy and angered that i was cramping up your space. Now you look happy? ”
“Well, the sun is shinning, the mood is glowing and the stars is yet to come out. GOD IS GOD!! ” he whistled.
Junior sighs.. ” Whatever. Anyhow how far; have you heard any news. I don’t want to use my phone and be online so nobody asks me anything yet especially Bruno since I have been ignoring his call. I need to have my story covered up. So anything.?”
Yes. Amara is alife and guess what..she was in Bruno’s house and she be looking all fresh and healthy.. I guess Bruno has her now.
“Nope. ” he continued whistling.
“Fxxk!! I have to stay here for another day or two. Could you do me a favour. Call Bruno and find out what’s up with him..you know, check in. Just generally. He has stopped calling me since yesterday after those plenty missed calls. I refused to answer nor return. And then. . Maybe tomorrow you can stroll by Amara’s, I would give you her address. I just want to make sure no one saw me there or calling my name as the prime suspect. I am sure there is news already of her demise;but we just haven’t heard”
“No and No.”
“Cos I don’t feel like Junior. I gave you a hideout that’s it. Anything else you do it yourself. You know what, stay another day or two and then you can leave. I would be out of time by next tomorrow anyways so..” he trails off, busying around in the kitchen
“Do you know anything I don’t know Timothy? Don’t Fxxk with me?”
“Me? Nah. I am just saying as per helping a bro out. I am giving you a place to hide out and have your alibi. But I ain’t going to do your shit for you. Nigga no. And anything you don’t know? Well…karma is a bitch! !” He said ignoring junior.
Junior stares at him and says nothing.
Wondering if he took shisha as he went out briefly and it messed with his head.
He needed to be on the low for another day or two. Then he would come out. No one would ever pin him to Amara’s.
He sighs ” Damn you Amara, how you let me miss digging into your sweetness. Damn you!!”
We stopped by the suya man ..after eating at mama Basira’s
“Give me 200 naira own oga” I tell him.
He cuts and hands it to me.. I gave it to her and encouraged her to go ahead.. as we walked back
“Nice?” I ask her as we neared the house. She nodded, handing it to me.
Feeling mischievous , I shake my head
“Why not? ” she eyes me..
“Unless you feed me… am not eating “.
She stares at me, then looks away wrapping the suya back and giving it to me.
“No and if you aren’t eating I won’t eat anymore too. Don’t know if there is something there and you want to trick me.” Her voice quiet but assertive
I noticed her stubborn chin. .
“Hey am kidding. Here.. see? ” I open the suya and place a meat in my mouth and chewed, watching her watch me.
We had entered the house now , there was light . Pleased, I turned on the fan.. leaving the light off. The light from the moon danced lazily in from the window.
Giving her back the suya, I held on to one .. eyeing her
“Can I feed you then? ” we were standing just inside the closed door, mischievous glint in my eyes.
“No!” She made to move, I block her.
“No.. please let me pass” I blocked her again, moved her to the wall.
“Nah ah.. just let me feed you and you can go sit down or something . Didn’t you cook for me this morning .? . the least I can say is thank you and this suya I am holding is from my heart. Please accept it” I pleaded, laughter in my eyes
“No” I didn’t realised she had gotten to the wall. . And I was barely a few spaces infront of her..
“No” a Lil laugh, turning her head
“Yes” a whisper. .
Stop it Bruno. Step away.
I tell myself .
“No” her hands to my chest, trying to push me away
I loved the way her hands felt flat to my chest”
“No..Bruno. stop. I don’t want. ”
“Yes Amara.. you must ”
Stop it Bruno. Don’t move further.
Red warning going off in my head. I ignored it.
Too late, I was staring at her lips and forgotten all about the suya.. I just wanted to kiss her and that’s it.
Just. Kiss. Her
I risk a glance to her eyes.. searching..
Hoping… desiring. But I would never take … never. Unless. .
I swore.. shaking my head.
“I am sorry ” I whisper closing my eyes
” for what?” Her voice came back to me as a whisper..
“I- I was almost tempted to kiss you !” I laughed at my stupidity. . I prayed she didn’t hear me.. I begin to pull away.
Then I heard it..
No… Did she just say…
“What?” I turn back to her.. “What did you say? ”
“Then why don’t you kiss me then. . ” her lashes lowered..
“Why?. Because I said so. Am sorry Amara. ”
“No.. because I too want to…be kissed. I have never been…..” she trails off
I blink… “You lying ..”
Her head lowered. .. I raise her head up.
” you aren’t lying?” She shakes her head
” Amara if it’s because I said so am sorry for being a dick and saying what’s in my mind. But you don’t just tell a guy who wants to kiss you to kiss you if you don’t want him to you know. . We talked about this last night remember. .”
“I want to be kissed… ” she breathed then continues
‘I want to know how it feels like….I want to feel it.. I just want to..and this time I really really want it . Just a kiss. ..” she bites her lower lips..
That was my undoing. . I swore.
Leaning into her, slowly. . Very very slowly. ..
Raising her chin up to reach her lips… I lean in..breaths apart…. she closed her eyes ..I close mine and..
To be continued. ..
#StephanieEgberike #writes #TheSweetperspectives #sweetness#Allthingsfinery #Wordporn-series #ThisMadnessCalledLove #chp32